#fatfreefloozy

Yum! Breakfast smoothie to wash down my 83.1kg weigh-in. Have undone some of the Easter damage! Woohoo! Coconutty berry smoothie 4 strawberries 20 frozen blueberries 180mls coconut milk 1 tspn raw cocao 1 tspn rice malt syrup Blend. Drink. Pic to the left!! Hugs, #fff xoxo

So, one month later and I'm back. I've been mentally preparing myself for this day. I have created a new header which exposes me in all my wrinkly, loose skin goodness - doing what I love best; posing, exercising and singing! I am more prepared than one month ago. I've spent my time reading these books over the past four weeks; I feel much more aware of how my body is going to respond to sugar withdrawal and what I did wrong the first time. I'm sure that this journey will not be perfect, but I am at least taking the first step again. And after Easter's little two kilo gain, it is very apt timing.  #fff xoxo PS - I have set up an instagram. Hit me up with your user names!!!

So, I was doing very, very well for three days. Virtually no sugar. However, on the 4th day I had an unprepared day. I went to work, headed to my 4pm spray tan and then rushed to get to a gig I was singing at. I'd had no sugar up until that point and the meal was provided. It was a ten course designation by a beautiful chef and I asked to be served after I sang. I got the meal at about 10pm, and by then the adrenaline pumping, I was starving. I downed a few smoked salmon somethings and then my sister grabbed me a can of coke and I practically skulled it. I don't even normally drink coke, but I was so tired, hungry, thirsty, glad that it was over and stressed, that I did. The next day, I worked a full 8 hour shift again, and then taught guitar for two hours and then rushed to another gig. This time I ordered dinner. I couldn't even eat it. Well, I had 6 cajun chips with lime yoghurt and that was that. I had a friend arrive to stay Friday night and then, Saturday had a day at...

So, I am reading this - Extract: Sweet Poison: Why Sugar Makes us Fat | Penguin Books Australia  and I have only finished chapter One (which is a kazillion pages long btw), but I am sensing that I may be, hold onto your seats, a sugarholic. I realise that I am also a fataholic, milkaholic, donutaholic, chipaholic etc, but there lies a little bit of a clue in Chapter One that is leading me to believe that my other binges, might all be blameable on my first! Calm your farm fat free floozy! There is also a shitload of reasons why sugar is crap for you and not a whole reasons why it is good. So, actually there is like a kazillion (or 50ish) pages about the detrimental health benefits of sugar and none about how it raises me above falling asleep in my staff meetings! I'm not going 100% sugar free, but am becoming mindful of what I am eating that has sugar in it. So, todays meals included: Breakfast: One weetbix with milk Recess: Two rice crackers and a white coffee Lunch: No ...

I have been soon on track this week. I am aching from all the amazing classes that I have attended and my mental health is so much better when I exercise. Food has been great. I was starving today, but kept my eating on track. I am not counting calories, or fat, or worrying too much - just filling my body with the good stuff and allowing myself the occasional treat. I haven't quit sugar yet, but I did download the "Sweet Poison" e-book to educate myself about the dangers. And the weekly weigh-in result? Another 600 grams down, and at this end of the journey, I'll take that. My NSV of the week is definitely a lady coming up to me at Zumba class and saying, "I tried to keep up with you, but I just couldn't. You are so springy!!" Made my day. Weekly Weigh-In: Start weight : 132kg Last week: 83.5 This week: 82.9 Loss this week: 0.6kg Total loss: 49.1kg Left to go: 17.9kg Love ya guts! #FFF xoxo

So, I lost 100 grams this week. I've worked out steadily. I've eaten well. Yet, I feel a little out of control. I feel like I am constantly thinking about eating and not eating and starving and binging and it all revolves around one tiny thing. Food addiction. I have overcome so many obstacles along this journey, but the fact that food still has so much power over me, drives me crazy. For instance, I may finish my day on 1200 calories and do a Body Combat class and feel amazing, but if there is a party pie on the morning tea plate, I CANNOT say No to it! It calls me, and I think about it until I have it. Then, sometimes I need to compensate later by skipping dinner for a glass of milk. At the time, I rationalise my choices, but I HATE that food controls me. And I think the whole root of the problem is my absolute and unwavering addiction to sugar. I am researching now, the hold that sugar has over me, and I'm thinking that sugar and I need to have a long awaited break-up. ...

It's been a really good week. I started the week after my last post well. I headed to Sh'Bam at 6pm. The problem? It was actually Body Combat at 5:30pm. They have a fortnightly rotation and due to Australia Day, I stuffed it up! Derr! Tuesday night was my friend's birthday and we had a lovely dinner with all her friends, so no gym. Headed to Zumba and poured my soul into it (because I felt guilty for having two nights off). Went to Zumba again Thursday at my regular Zumba place (not the gym!) and was so happy to be sweaty and puffing! The instructor has a dace background and pushes us to shake it so much more than other Zumba instructors! Got home Friday and completely cleaned the house ready for some special visitors who were arriving Saturday. On Saturday morning I got up early and headed to Pump. This is a big change for me. Normally, if I have an excuse, like visitors coming, I would make an excuse not to go. But, nup, this time I went early. Having an old friend visit ...